Dating For Middle Aged In Usa

If you're looking for a wife then why not look for an older Asian woman? Asian women tend to age gracefully, and love the security that a Western man can offer them. Here are some tips for finding an older Asian woman of your dreams...

What It’s Like to Date After Middle Age Newly single older people are finding a dating landscape vastly different from the one they knew in their 20s and 30s. Jul 22, 2020 Dating Middle Aged: How to Make the Best of It. The deep-rooted worldviews, experience, past grievances, and fears associated with ex-partners, stereotypes, and the idea of how everything should be with partners can undermine the whole process of middle-aged women dating. Usually, people are not very adaptable at this age. Jul 24, 2019 More and more middle-aged folks — and even seniors — are getting back in the dating game these days. The latest stats from the Pew Research Center show that spouses over 50 are calling it.

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Why date an older Asian woman?

If you register with one of the many Asian dating sites like Cherry Blossoms and ChnLove Club you'll no doubt receive many admirer smiles and emails from beautiful and sexy young ladies.
Another problem with young Asian girls is that a lot of these girls (particularly from mainland China) have fairly conservative upbringings. Consequently the younger Asian girls you'll meet on dating sites are often very inexperienced at relationships. If you date one of the girls be prepared for a lot of potential heartbreak! Aaargh, I'm speaking from experience here, but dating a lady younger than 40 is a nightmare at times!
If you've ever been to Thailand or the Philippines then you'll no doubt see plenty of middle aged Western men with beautiful stunning 20 year old girls at their side. While this is great for our egos, the majority of these girls are normally girlfriends, not wives. There seems to be a bit of a myth that Asian women prefer much older men as husbands. While I guess this is true for some women (my sister prefers older men), it's only true up to a point. If you look on a Japanese or South Korean dating site you'll not find that many 20 year old girls looking for 50 year old husbands. So bear in mind that if you are being contacted by much younger ladies it's normally about the money. Some guys are fine with this. But if you value love more than youth then you're normally better off with an older woman.
The good news is that Asian ladies age gracefully, so an Asian woman 10-15 years younger than yourself could look a lot younger than a Western woman of the same age. I guess some of this is down to genetics. But it's also lifestyle related. Asian women (particularly of Chinese origin) don't tend to smoke or drink alcohol that much. Not many Asians have cars, so they have to walk or cycle a lot more. Asian diets are also packed with nutritious fruit and vegetables, and Western junk food like donuts and TV dinners are thankfully rare in much of Asia.
Finally, there is a lot less competition for older women. On dating sites 20-30 year old women get a lot of admirers, but the older ladies are not so popular. An older woman will really appreciate the interest from a sincere Western gentleman.

Countries where you can find older Asian women

Thailand is a good choice if you want to retire to Asia. The cost of living in Thailand is low by Western standards. Housing is cheap, and the weather is great. In the major cities like Bangkok it's also possible to get access to high quality healthcare and other essential services.
A less well known alternative is to retire to China. While many Westerners are often suspicious of China, it's a great place to live. The areas of Guangdong Province bordering Hong Kong are the most popular with Westerners. Guangdong Province has a sub-tropical climate and is a very pleasant place to retire with your lovely older Asian woman.
These parts of China are much more Westernised compared to other parts of China. It's possible to get access to Western goods and services. The cost of living is much lower compared to Hong Kong itself. Popular cities in the area include Guangzhou (Canton), Zhongshan and Zuhai. Hong Kong and Guangzhou's international airports make this part of mainland China very accessible from other parts of the world. Living costs in China are very low, with low apartment costs, very low taxes and food is incredibly cheap. Restaurants are so affordable in China that you wouldn't need a kitchen, even if your wife was an excellent cook (and Chinese women usually are!)
The Philippines is also a popular choice for Western men looking for older Asian women. Filipina ladies are popular as they normally speak good English. They are also usually Christian and very family orientated, which makes them particularly popular with the many men for whom religion plays an important part of their lives.

Where to find an older Asian woman

There are loads of online Asian Internet dating sites that allow Western men to find older Asian women. You can either try a site that has Asian women from a range of countries or sign up with one that caters for a particular niche. The online dating market is dominated by huge players like match.com. Consequently it is the niche sites that thrive. If you want to find a mature woman from Asia then Cherry Blossoms or Asian Kisses is worth a look. If you know what country you want to find an Asian wife from then sites like AsianEuro, Thai Kisses, Chn Love (for older Chinese ladies), Filipino Cupid or My Filipina Passion (for older Filapina ladies) are worth a look.
Alternatively marriage agencies like Anglo Thai Introductions will help you in your search for an older Asian woman. I much prefer marriage agencies as they take a lot more care to weed out scammers as well as ladies who would be totally unsuitable for marrying a Western man. Sure, some people don't like the idea of these agencies. But let's face facts. A lot of people don't like dating or are too busy to find a partner (this applies to woman as well as men). A lot of the men and women using these agencies have already been married in the past, so they're through with the fluffy romantic stuff and don't want years of dating and lavish weddings. A marriage agency can therefore make a lot of sense to both the man and the woman.
Good luck with your search for a beautiful older Asian woman! Here are some more second time around dating ideas.

Would an older Asian woman make a good wife? Any dating stories to tell? Post comments below...

Robert on February 25, 2020:

Very intested .im not crazy about american women

frnka on November 03, 2019:

looking for long term relationship. a good Wife , for the rest of my life .

daryle officer on May 15, 2019:

looking for older asaian fr marriage

David from Australia on February 23, 2017:

I think that this is pretty good advice. If you really want an Asian wife from the East or South-East, maturity is likely to bring you the greatest chance of happiness. A younger woman is good for the ego for maybe a hot moment, then the foolishness of the choice will become apparent. My Thai wife and I are both middle-aged ( I am 10 years her senior) and she brings me great joy and companionship. Having said that, we met and live in my own country, though I am open to moving to Thailand in the future.

Blair Davis on September 13, 2014:

As the years role by one day your mother and father will be gone and all you have left is love follow your HEART !

captain elvis on June 15, 2013:

l belive love does not know boundries where i fine my love i belive is she

TravisPerera on April 01, 2013:

Hi,

I'm 28 and having an relationship with a beautiful Chinese woman age of 34. We both go to gum and workout. When I talked to my parents about her they said, You'll look like walking with your mother in 5 years from now with her. I don't know what to do. Please advise...

chuy on September 26, 2011:

Asian women are reared to respect the family and especially their husbands. I just lost my Okinawan wife of 47 years to cancer. She exemplified the wedding vow 'in sickness and in health, for better or for worst until death do us part'. She was a true love for me and my children. So yes, if you want love forever, Okinawan women are the best in my book.

Bowhunter on January 10, 2011:

I believe asian women are very caring and loving, as well as sophisticated.

I married a chinese lady of 45, and I am 32. We have had a baby together and I love her more than I can tell her. She is honest, family oriented, beautiful and has a heart of gold.

China has a wonderful tradition and an interesting culture that keeps me close to the country.

If you are looking for a good wife, and a faithful partner, try an asian woman, but don't expect that you can roam 'At Large' hehehe.....you MUST be ready for a lifetime affair.

tom on December 17, 2010:

i have worked with a lot of asian ladies in my life. everyone of them had a special beauty. each her own. but all were beautyful people. and i miss all of them. aloha. tom

Dating in middle age presents many of the same challenges as dating at any age: Where do you find someone to date? Once you’ve found them, how do you know if they’re the one? How do you protect yourself while remaining vulnerable enough to fall in love? You know the story.

Well, sorry to break it to you, but this article isn’t going to answer any of these questions. Instead, I’m going to share with you the three super groovy advantages of dating in middle age:

Advantage # 1: Traditional Roles and Relationships Do Not Apply
Women today are educated, professionals, and have the resources to provide for themselves. They enjoy having their own place and own space, and don’t need their lives to be centered on one person.

In fact, according to recent studies, more than half of older singles say the best things about being single are independence and personal freedom.

This freedom allows you to throw away the idea of a traditional relationship and co-create one with your partner that suits both of you. It could mean (re)marriage, companionship and fun, or physical intimacy—in any combination. You have the resources to choose.

Advantage # 2: You Know What You Want
There’s something about the wisdom of middle age that helps cut through the bologna and inspires the authentic expression of desires, expectations, and feelings. There’s less fear about putting it all on the line because your wisdom tells you it’s better to find out now if you’re a good fit instead of waiting for later.

As Treva Scharf said in an interview with AARP, she knew her husband “…was the one because he drove the relationship without his foot on the brakes. He was direct, fearless, and didn’t play games. He knew what he wanted, and he proceeded with confidence…” His candor helped both he and Treva know where they stood from the beginning and solidified that the relationship was worth pursuing.

By directly expressing your feelings and expectations, you may find, as Michael Liberatore did, that the best thing about finding love later in life is “…knowing myself and what I will tolerate…I don’t put up with the stuff I did when I was young and didn’t realize I had to ask for what I wanted instead of just waiting and hoping for it”

And speaking of knowing what you want…

Advantage # 3: The Three-Date Rule Doesn’t Apply
You are grown. If you and your date are feeling it, then go for it. No one at midlife is going to think you’re cheap or easy if you give it up on the first date. You simply know what you want, aren’t afraid to get it, and have the wisdom to know that it doesn’t mean love, it means s-e-x. If you have a real connection with someone, it’s not going to end after one night. It’s going to continue and potentially blossom into something satisfying for both of you.

I would be remiss if I didn’t remind you to practice safe sex. In 2013, the CDC reported that 21% of new HIV diagnoses were in individuals over 50. And, from 2015 to 2016, there was a 20% jump in sexually transmitted infections among Americans 45 and older. Exercise Super Groovy Advantage # 2 and say no to anyone who isn’t willing to protect you or themselves. Educate yourself and be prudent.

Although dating at any age has its challenges, you, as a middle-aged dater, have three distinct advantages:

1. Traditional roles and relationships do not apply. You have the freedom to design your own relationship.

2. You have the wisdom to know what you want and the candor to ask for it; and 3. The three-date rule does not apply.

Celebrate your midlife, my friend, and stay super groovy!

Referenced in this article:

Baby boomers and sexually transmitted diseases (2018). Retrieved from https://www.stdaware.com/blog/baby-boomers-and-sexually-transmitted-diseases/

Emling, S. (2017, February). Never too late for love. AARP.

Kantrowitz, B., Raymond, J., Springen, K., Wingert, P., Kuchment, Al, & Kelley, R. (2006). The boomer files: relationships. Sex & love: the new world. Newsweek, 147(8), 50-60.

Lilleston, R. (2017, September). STD rates keep rising for older adults. AARP.

Watson, W. K., & Stelle, C. (2011). Dating for older women: Experiences and meanings of dating in later life. Journal of Women and Aging, 23, 263-275. doi:10.1080/08952841.2011.587732

Traci Clarida is an author, speaker, and coach whose vibrant energy spreads positivity, love, and compassion to the world. She inspires women to get stuff done through authentic living and embracing perfect imperfection. She teaches clients how to find freedom from self-judgment and provides proven strategies to guide them to overcome obstacles, complete goals, and execute solid plans for success. Follow Traci on Facebook and Instagram. For more information visit www.letsgetstuffdone.com

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